walked &told myself stories. in world as I remade it (#god wannabe), nothing forbidden
I'll tell you a story &maybe you'll believe me. #control #narrative #words story of what happened, or what did not happen but should have to have no loved version of your life, but the one you made that the secret to running is to know why you run &where you go -leave behind reason u.. right out of college &full of ideas. child, some days we don't even have a family. (haha aw) I knew that look. one more word &I would be in trouble wanted her before she knew what it was meant. wanted to trust it ate the heart out of her got dat nothing gonna stop you look girl. keeping head down, away from demanding eyes behind the story I tell is the one I don't .behind what you hear is one I wish you could hear I am no longer a grown up outraged child, but a woman letting go of outrage. scare them into changing what they haven't even thought about before. (good fear). change when it comes cracks everything open. (harbinger). if you don't ask me to fix it, you can ask anything. (aw) children: believing the shape of life they must live is as small &mean &broken as they see I tell my stories to prove I was meant to survive. (YAHS KWEEN. LIVE. LOVE. RESIST). sex was familiar, but love was another country. only stubbornness kept me moving (some are born w it, others have to fight harder ). some days ..I wanted most.. -2weep at inept female bod in which I was imprisoned (LOL). love that yearned as much for the spirit as for the body. (life test:will u be reborn /fixed?) her legs setting a pace for mine. &I need to know how strong we both can be. I know I'm supposed to be deeply broken, incapable of love or trust, but I'm not. I tell all the others so as not to have to tell that one look that trusts nothing &wants everything. (SLAVE TO FLESH MACHINE BOD). my niece turned her face to me, waiting to be taken away, persuaded, healed. telling the story all the way through is an act of love. I can tell you anything. all you have to believe is the truth.
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if you can keep your head , when all about you are losing theirs &blaming.. trust yourself when all men doubt, but make allowance for their doubting too; if you can wait ¬ be tired of waiting, or being lied about, don't deal in lies, or being hated, don't give way to hating, &yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise. if you can dream -¬ make dreams your master; think -¬ make thoughts your aim; if you can meet w Triumph &Diaster, &treat those 2 imposters just the same; if you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken twisted by knaves to make a trap fro fools, or watch the things you gave your life to, broken. &stoop &build em up w worn -out tools. if you can make 1 heap of all your winnings &risk it on 1 turn of pitch &toss, &lose, &start again at your beginnings, &never breathe a word about your loss.. if you can talk w crowds &keep your virtue, or walk w Kings -nor lose the common touch, if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you. if all men count w you, but none too much.. Yours is the Earth &everything that's in it, &-which is more -you'll be a Man, my son!
-father's advice to son; Kipling "in order2be able2think you have2risk being offensive."JBP
i am no bird; &no net ensnares me. -charlotte bronte
D.E.A.R. "never give in, never give in, never, never, never, never -in nothing, great or small, large or petty -never give in except to convictions of honor &good sense." -w. churchill. 10/28/41
i am not afraid of storms, for i am learning how to sail my ship. -louisa may alcott
nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. talent will not: nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. education will not: the world is full of educated derelicts. persistence &determination alone are omnipotent. -calvin coolidge i am not an extraordinary man, &i am quite ordinary. but God chose me for something quite extraordinary. -a. valladares receives '16 canterbury medal.
not failure, but low aim, is crime -james russell lowell
a genuine leader is not a searcher for consensus but a molder of consensus -mlk jr. (you are all leaders .#experts) it is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. the credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust &sweat &blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again &again because there is no effort without error &shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worth cause; who at the best knows in the end the trump of high achievement, &who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold &timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat. -theodore roosevelt we are what we repeatedly do. excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit. -aristotle
no one can make you feel inferior without your consent. -eleanor roosevelt a dead thing can go with the stream, but only a living thing can go against it.-gk c.
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